I seen this image on Twitter yesterday and it made me laugh out loud so I thought I would share on this Friday.
Most smartphones have a panoramic photo mode where the phone stiches photos together into one wide panoramic photo after you pan the camera. Well technology is not always perfect but in this case it was so perfectly weird that it was better than just a panoramic photos with a cat waking through.
As the cat walked by when the person was shooting the pano it resulted in the centipede cat. Please don’t start rumors and internet conspiracy theories that this is a real cat with multiple legs and 9 feet long. Can you imagine the cat box or foot long hair balls coughed up on the floor?
I use the popular mobile app for Nextdoor to keep up to date on what is going on in my neighborhood. In my SW Portland neighborhood we put the Weird in Portland. This week after many coyote sightings and other reports, someone posted a funny sarcastic warning about “pygmy wolves”. There is never a dull moment or something not funny in Mr. Hurley’s Neighborhood.
It's become clear to me that SW Portland is suffering from a major infestation of pigmy wolves. Based on panicked daily reports on Nextdoor, I estimate that there are probably upward of 7000 of these vicious creatures running in about 500 packs. They are dragging away our cats, small dogs and unwary toddlers.
This is no laughing matter folks. Experimentation with pigmy wolves leads to the next step up and eventually you're dealing with a full-blown timber wolf infestation.
I think we in the west hills have three logical alternatives for action:
1) Gather all the villagers in a line at the ridge with garbage can lids and shotguns. Beating the lids with baseball bats, we will drive the savage beasts down towards the river, drowning most and shooting those that escape.
2) Gather at the river with lit torches, then set the fields and forests aflame, driving them up towards the ridge line where we will shoot them as they run across the exposed alpine meadows.
3) Pool our resources and rent a few helicopters. We can then shoot them dead from the air or hit them with tranquilizers when they can then be radio tagged and released in the wild (Beaverton is my suggestion).
Anyone have a better suggestion? I'm scared stiff to take my cat out for a walk lest I return home trailing an empty leash and with a lot of explaining to do to the wife.
Oh and if you spot this friendly
tasty chicken, please let me know as another of my neighbors is looking for this escapee pet before the pygmy wolves or another hungry neighbor find it.
Today in the Autodesk Lake Oswego Oregon (aka Portland) office we have costumes, food, and a pumpkin contest.
I think already found my current creative pumpkin “I'm Here for the Boos” complete with a tap and pours wine.
One of the scariest things to be feared in an office, the “Reply All”…
Survey Says, Autodesk University 2016 will be a lot of Fun!
I am really looking forward to this fun event at Autodesk University this year. I get to go against my good friend, colleague, and fellow Portlandia resident Lynn Allen which will be a lot of fun at my expense. Luckily I am not against Robert Green and his perfect hair.
I hope you will register at booth 2449 and join my team.
If you can’t make it to AU this year, you can still participate by responding to our AutoCAD Family Feud survey questions. The questions are easy and the purpose is fun! Autode.sk/2cyXpMx
I hope to see you at AU soon!
On a received flight from Portland Oregon (PDX) I noticed while walking from terminal B to C there was now a restroom area for dogs named Pet Relief. How interesting, funny, thoughtful, and so Portland. At Autodesk we are still strong on our love of dogs and they are still allowed in many of our offices. My daughter when she was a little girl used to call Autodesk Doggiedesk.
If you have done a lot of 3D laser scanning or LiDAR you know how waiting to see if the scan is done can be sometimes a hide and seek game to not get caught in the scan and photo. On a recent project the FARO scanner caught me as evidenced by the point matching when merging scans in Autodesk ReCap Pro. Laser scanning systems take photos at the end of a laser scan so that it can bake the color of the pixels into the points in the point cloud. After doing a lot of scans I guess I was getting impatient, exhausted, or just guessing wrong if the scan was completed.
Just over a week ago I hosted a Bad Poetry Slam at Autodesk’s Lake Oswego Oregon office during the Fusion 360 Teams Beer Bust for some fun. We had several last minute entries and all bad bad bad. Several employees submitted poetry as well as one external submission from a reader of this blog. Some were listed as anonymous submissions while others took full responsibility for their literary creations.
While all submitted poetry was bad, one clearly sank to the bad poetry bottom which is a winner for this fun contest.It took a considerable amount of effort and 5 pages of poetry, but people were wincing and groaning especially at the end with its clever ending. In fact the winning poet said he could have gone on for 5 more paragraphs of painful poetry, thankfully he did not.
Warning:: Bad Poetry Below…
The winning poem by Andy “Not Shakespeare” Sears
It starts off like any other
I'm having fun, enjoying no slumber
it is late and I understand what needs to happen
I understand the direction
I need to get cracken
in that direction lies the path
along the ground lies its wrath
horror it sounds worse than it is
concerned, I will tell you this
the entryway was blocked
I make my way through
I am reminded of Dr. Seuss
Of Horton Hears a Who
Horton had a journey
Horton had a goal
Horton had a burden
of where he had to go
similar fear of where I need to go
Forward anyway towards the final show
the entryway behind me
I move forward with guarded haste
realize this is a dangerous place
but my end goal is forward based
known and unknown what could be in front
Finding the way is always the brunt
the silence is all around the darkness is redundant
I know the Perils of moving through this gauntlet
what I don't understand is what it will get
uncomfortable and scared, simple little brick
that is the feeling when the blanket is gone
my path is not clear with a struggle for dawn
in the end only I will know success
only I find the true duress
it is unclear whether success will be granted
to know my failures will cause unrest
my Journey Begins with one step of the foot
journey will end with a successful output
solution only I can be the judge
of this success and failure navigating the fields of grudge
only I will know if I have have won
My journey is afoot the perils have been known
I still don't see them but you know they are home
I wonder now that I've begun
can I turn back is it too late
the place looked warm and safe
now I must move forward
although the brick is waiting.
I trudged along and find myself falling
lifting myself up keep on pressing
keep on moving I've made it this far
I can't turn back not even for the star
I know what is in front
I know it is in back
there is another piece that I have to find
I saw it earlier but now it skipped my mind
I know it is around I know it is waiting
it is lurking in the dark, like a tree that is hating
in the shadows just baiting me to fall
round the corner, hit like a ball
I feel the pain, the pain is searing
From the bottoms of my legs
My moan is really screaming
I knew it was there
was there all along
it told me earlier, I have your song
I heard it's call and I did not listen
only thing I know now is it is bad to hasten
standing up and move to cover
I know my journey is almost over
In the last I find a stair
to take me out of there
this stair was steep but I find it none the less
hands and feet made it to the crest
I finally make it, I finally collapse
tomorrow the pain will not lapse
nothing yet for their day as not awaken
I know soon they will be ready to bacon
their eyes will open
come out with a smile
the first thing I will tell them
is my journey felt like a million miles
I will try to explain what it is that they have done
the pain that they have caused
the damage that they could have done
but the damage is overrated and exaggerated
their fun was worth it even for a few minutes
smiles can be a dangerous business
being happy is underrated
I know they mean no harm
nonetheless the message is clear
pick up your damn Legos!
Over the Summer the Autodesk Lake Oswego Oregon (Portland) had some smart and fun high school interns developing the next version of BXD. BXD was developed to test FIRST Robotics robots complete with a physics engine. Many new features are coming to BXD from their work this summer, but they also had some fun. The interns challenged a nearby office building to a game of hangman using post it notes. The funniest response from the other office building was the hangman game where the phrase was “What is an Auto Desk.” Office window hangman games, go try your own.
I have been working on a remote project for a week and very little access to the internet.
If you are celebrating Labor Day this weekend, please be safe.
Yes, back in the late 90s there was a creepy Dancing Baby “Baby Cha Cha” that seemed to be all the rage on the young growing Internet. Jon Bell a colleague here in the Autodesk Lake Oswego office has been involved with the Autodesk 3d Max /3D Studio teams since the early beginnings and was able to find the source file for me. I just had to render it in the new 3ds Max 2017 for nostalgic fun and I was also planning to use it in an internal video project.
The Dancing Baby history and its animating in 3ds Max r3 released Character Studio is complicated, but the credit for the early Internet meme fame was due to an animator at LucasArts and the Character Studio and 3ds Max Teams.
I am hosting another fun Autodesk Lake Oswego Oregon office event as a follow up to the fun PowerPoint Karaoke we held a couple months ago. This time it is a Bad Poetry Slam August 24th at our Autodesk Lake Oswego Beer Bust event hosted by the Fusion 360 Team.
We all know how easy good poetry is to write (am I right), but we want the more difficult and rare bad poetry to shine, celebrated, and toasted with fine Oregon beers. I have challenged employees to come up with some bad poetry to share or have them read as anonymous art to entertain and inspire attendees. The only rules are keep it fun and PG-13 with suggested topics of Autodesk Life and products.
The winner chosen by peers will get the proud privilege to see their poetry on a big poster in our office.
I am opening this up to everyone, not just the Autodeskers and product teams, but our customers.
My laser scanner shuffle moving around the scanner instead of sitting underneath or walking away. I will most times wear headphones with music playing.
So do you Play air guitar and drums, make sound effects like a laser “pew pew pew”, or just look boss with a cool laser? Come on you can admit it now in the comments.
I posted some of these these pages from old drafting standards on a Throwback Thursday two weeks ago, and people loved them, so I will share more of the timeless words of wisdom from the Drafting Time Machine. This is from a Drafting Standards Manual from Ralph M. Parsons Company in 1975 and were titled the Basic Dozen.
Enjoy this Basic Dozen Tip on drafting from 1975:
Point 5 Use Dotted Lines to Clarify
Although the illustrations and terminology may be out of date the wisdom is still true to this day.
PowerPoint Karaoke is where a person volunteers (or volunteered) to get in front of a group of people to speak for 3-5 minutes to 10 PowerPoint slides they have never seen before. Sounds fun for the audience right? Believe it or not It is even more fun for the presenter.
The slides are created to be funny and stump the person making the result entertaining and a challenge to try to speak a compelling and consistent themed presentation. I first saw PowerPoint Karaoke a few years ago at an Ignite event and it was amazing and so much fun. Our Autodesk Lake Oswego Oregon office will be holding a PowerPoint Karaoke next Monday afternoon and you can contribute to the hilarity with suggesting slides or images for us to use and ambush presenters.
The presenter shall NOT see the presentation slides in advance.
The presenter delivers each slide in succession without skipping slides or going back.
The presentation time shall be limited to 3 minutes and ~10 slides.
Weaving positive Autodesk topics into the presentation will get you bonus points.
The speech must be related to the PowerPoint slides. General nonsense and comedic mayhem is not allowed.
The jury shall have a sense of humor.
Games will judged by a panel or by popular vote.
Content and Credibility
Poise and Gestures
Flow (minimal pauses and stammering)
Getting through all the slides!
Some fun ideas of slide content that might just explain daily life here at Autodesk.
Do you have some funny images to suggest using in the PowerPoint Karaoke? Email me images or links,but they must not be copyright and also G-rated.
No more Death by PowerPoint, instead it will be Laughs by PowerPoint. This might be something really fun to try sometime at Autodesk University where PowerPoint can be overwhelming after a few days.
The Everhart Museum currently has an exhibition on Prohibition and has included the infamous Engineers Guide to Drinks Drawing framed on the wall. I will be releasing the 3D DWG version of this drawing very soon thanks to the hard work of a volunteer named Robert Lupo.
The exhibit opened July 9th 2015 and will run to December.
Here are a couple photos from the exhibit on Flickr copyright by the photographer Nezkapix
Some press about this exhibit.
I think we should make each drink according to the drawing and see if they are good for test accuracy and quality assurance purposes.
OK the jury might still be out if I am an alien life form, or not. Last night I had a funny out of this world experience while practicing and testing flight control technologies with an unmanned aerial vehicle (UAV) at dusk in NW Portland’s Cathedral Park. The park is located near the amazing and iconic St Johns Bridge.
I had just landed the UAV when a group of 6 (sobriety-claiming) adults young and old tourist came running down the path breathing heavy after running. One of them exclaimed “there is the UFO!” They told me they had been up on the hill by the bridge when they spotted a flying craft that the father suspected “was not of this world and flying at 1000 miler per hour, as well as transformed shapes and blinking colored lights.”
I showed my new excited friends the UAV (aka UFO) and flew it for them as they all laughed and took photos. I took the opportunity to educate them and explain how it all worked and that it was indeed of this Earth. I also pointed out that I was only flying 20mph and not 1000 mph as they guesstimated. They said they had been recording the “UFO event” on their phones as proof to assure their place in UFOology fame and all the fortune. It was a fun demonstrating the UAV and answering their questions and detailing the positive uses of such an alien looking camera carrying robot such as how we at Autodesk are researching the aerial platform capturing 3D geometry to be used in design, construction, 3D model creation in addition to our past with search and rescue projects and flying in Kenya in addition to using the UAV as a really great camera and video documentation tool for projects.
The nice folks even took their photo with the debunked friendly UFO with me as the friendly alien abducting their camera to take their photo as well as snapping a photo with the UAV. Most people might get concerned about a UAV such as privacy and I educate them on their uses and the responsibility of the pilot, but the concern of the UAV as a UFO was a new one to me.
-Shaan (aka possible alien life form)
This will surely brighten anyone's day!
Some of us take our love of Autodesk products to the extreme in fact I have seen wedding proposals and invitations made in AutoCAD. It was great to see my friend Donnie Gladfelter (aka The CADGeek) become a new parent along with his lovely wife Helen. His awesome employer CADD Microsystems gave the new Jackson Gladfelter a new outfit outfit that says “Latest Autodesk Product.”
I would say Donnie and Helen have an 18 year subscription term product, and well worth it and so very cute.
I wish all the joys and frustrations of parenting to Donnie and Helen Gladfelter (she did all the hard work.) The Facebook comments to the photo of baby Jackson Gladfelter are priceless and filled with AutoCAD related puns in good fun. I think this is a perfect product launch and no service pack required but look out for using the DIVIDE or COPY command again so soon.
Congratulations Jackson, you didn’t pick Donnie as a dad but must put up with him legally for at least a little over 17 years more.
I noticed an experiment yesterday in a Portland area park located atop a dormant volcano where an adult and a child had drawn their designs for a future home. Mind you this is in no way scientific, but does match other examples I have heard. Dr. Saul Griffith in DC last year mentioned a young girls idea for an invention for a mechanical cow to eat and then proceed to wash her laundry and spit it out the “end” folded.
I was flying a UAS (unmanned aerial system aka drone) in Portland’s beautiful Mt Tabor park and noticed the chalk drawings on the surface I was using as a launch site. One was by a child who proudly put her name on it and the other obviously an adult and I will hopefully show how I deduced that.
Aerial of the concrete surface aka drawing surface and drone landing pad that is possibly an underwater storage tank.
Here is the child's design for a house complete with a jungle gym play structure and wings so that it could fly and apparently a quick disconnect driveway named Skydrive. Hopefully Microsoft doesn’t initiate legal action against the young child for copyright issues on the term “skydrive.” Apparently this child is both smart and organized even adding a storage area in their design.
The house wing design seems like it has structural consideration in the design but no hint of the type of propulsion system to keep the house flying, but it’s a child's design and could simply fly on magical power sources or a herd of unicorns - Its Portland after all.
Ok now the unveiling of the adults design….<insert drum roll and bad bagpipe playing here>
The design is complete with fishing pond and an escalator to a giant bottle of alcohol. Nice ability to draw perspective, but no hint of flying and then there was the creepy huge spider inhabiting this jaded adult’s design for a house.
I do admit I like the escalator to a big cold beer and fishing hole, but wish my house could fly.
Imagination is part of being creative and the fact is children don’t yet have limits and bias to limit their imagination. I am always amazing when discussing engineering and design with kids and the solutions they suggest.
The young are the future and more engineers, artists, and architects are a great thing to have in this world and needed and exactly why Autodesk gives all their software away with design curriculum to students and faculty worldwide at http://students.autodesk.com/ in addition to having 123D consumer software specifically designed for kids. I will admit I usually try to get the kids attention with examples of rocket engine tests as that almost always gets their attention then you can steer discussions on design and more importantly listen and discuss with the m but don’t easily dismiss their ideas no matter ho9w wild they may seem. Remember their imagination has no bounds and they may bee just thinking outside a box we place ourselves into as we get older.One of the best experiences I had recently at Autodesk was being paired up on a design and build project with a young engineer on my team Evan Atherton. I think both Evan and I both learned something from of our perspectives.
If you have a user group or students wanting to discussion making things, design, rockets, or mechanical cows I am always happy to participate.
Who remembers the good old Autodesk 3ds Max and Character Studio product Dancing Baby from the late 90s that even made the Ally McBeal television show? I thought the dancing baby and all of the many versions had faded into history, but on a Delta Airlines flight this week the little dancing guy made an appearance dancing down the aisle causing me to laugh during a safety video for my early morning flight.
See the Internet Memes in this new Delta Video:
The Internetest safety video on the Internet
I am sitting in a new space in Autodesk’s San Francisco Steuart and would like a cappuccino. Let me rephrase that, I need caffeine please. I am located near the 2nd floor forest scene aka “The Park” at the picnic bench near the hammock, and complete with trees to possibly simulate the Lake Oswego Oregon office. In 15 minutes without the caffeine I may be in the hammock or cuddled under a tree.
Will my awesome Autodesk colleagues help me overcome my laziness and need of caffeine? Probably not going to happen, but it was fun asking and imagining a thousands rolling eyes.
If a team shows up with caffeine I will give you editorial control for a post proudly and blatantly espousing your team and product being the best within Autodesk or a piece of gum(unchewed) from my pants pocket - your choice.
<UPDATE> The shameless begging for coffee through social media actually worked. I received many eye rolls, teams came and chatted with me but Noah Cole Autodesk Director of Social Media (and from Portland) delivered to me a fresh made cappuccino. Next experiment will be for piles of cash, bottles of Pinot Noir and growlers of Oregon beer.
A friend texted me the following image this week:
"You see that camera button next to where you type? Hold it down and slide your finger up to the other camera button above your finger, and then let go. A bunch of new picture filters will pop up. Thank me later."
If you follow the simple instructions your iPhone will automatically send a photo or video to that person. I did not fall for it, but a few I sent it to did. After about the sixth person I felt bad, and worried that someone might do it while texting from an airport restroom or other embarrassing situation.
Some of the results with identities hidden.
My oldest son - whoops I revealed his identity, sorry son.
So don't play this evil iPhone trick on your friends and family with iPhones...
The Engineers Guide to Drinks drawing or Infographic as it is now called in reality was really just a test drawing was originally created by someone that was very creative or very bored in order to test pen plotters back in 1972. I was not the original creator, and never have taken credit for it other than re-drawing it again in AutoCAD and bringing it back to life. In bringing it back to life on this blog it has taken the world literally by storm making headlines on big name media sites such as Fast Company, Laughing Squid, and now Food & Wine Magazine. It made one of the Top 18 infographics of 2014 as selected by Fast Company.
Imagine that this 1972 created drawing gained well deserved fame 43 years later. I have now seen the drawing not only in the media but used as sample drawings again as recently as class sessions at Autodesk University and we even gave out nice prints at our Blogger and Social Meetup.
Live Long and Prosper Engineers Guide to Drinks!
I have started playing the game the "Goat Simulator" game by Coffee Stain Studios. How is this somehow related to Autodesk, well the Goat Simulator is using Autodesk Gameware's Scaleform technology to propel the super twisted fun gameplay. My son Jake showed it to me and told me it was fun and addicting, so naturally I just had to buy it and try it even though I am not really a gamer type of person.
Goat Simulator is almost like the game Grand Theft Auto but with goats and no drugs or crime. The game is available on desktop and mobiles everywhere although I play it on my iPhone.
Goat Simulator is Baaaaad to the bone with head butting action to take your stress and frustration from the day away.
I give it a custom rating of 4 hooves up!
I prefer to not have my shaving cream in a tube, let me explain...
This morning when waking up I did my normal routine of going to brush my teeth while still half asleep. I grabbed my trusty toothbrush, then a tube and squirted the contents onto said toothbrush and then started brushing my teeth. Ooooh yuck that tastes bad and no minty fresh flavor...WAIT that's my new shaving cream from Harry's Razor and not my minty Crest toothpaste.
And so this is how I started my Friday morning. So while I am used to shaving cream in a can the tube design is easy and I am sure more economical but has unintended accidental use written all over it for those of us who's brain starts slower in the morning.Hopefully I don't leave the bottle of Listerine and Drano on the counter.
Here are the two tubes in monochrome as I am half asleep and I don't think my eyes don't see color for the first 10 minutes after waking up.Hey, I'm just lucky to see at all when waking up so early.
I am sure this is how odd warning end up on products like "for external use only."This whole mix-up reminds me of the mismatched dress shoe incident at Autodesk University 2013.